The PimpGuide System is the move. Think of The System as a panty dropping, booty poppin, roadmap to sweet pooty tang. Each kit includes 'The Aura of Pimpness' Booklet, which is our exclusive guide to how to use this system to its full potential (see below). Incorporated are the essential components on which The System relies, with differing levels of trappings in each kit. Designed to get you doin what you damn well know that you're both already thinking, it's the ultimate conversation piece…a box full of sexually suggestive fun.
The PimpGuide System
You can’t beat The System
So let’s say you get in a bit of a jam. You’re hangin out on the couch with shorty and you can’t seem to figure out you’re next move. Or let’s say you haven’t even gotten that far…you’re at the party and you don’t know how to get her attention. Or maybe your just some sorry schmuck whackin off at home right now and you would like next Saturday night to be a little more productive. What’s your next move?
The PimpGuide System is the move. Think of The System as a panty dropping, booty poppin, roadmap to sweet pooty tang. Each kit includes ‘The Aura of Pimpness’ Booklet, which is our exclusive guide to how to use this system to its full potential (see below). Incorporated are the essential components on which The System relies, with differing levels of trappings in each kit. Designed to get you doin what you damn well know that you’re both already thinking, it’s the ultimate conversation piece…a box full of sexually suggestive fun.
Basically, we’re hookin ya up w/game in a box. We took the thinkin outta pimpin. Now it’s automatic. You’re welcome.
‘The Aura of Pimpness’: the PimpGuide Manual
The manual is the heart of the PimpGuide System. While other books and sites focus on techniques to get girls, we focus on you. Instead of selling a two bit scheme, we are selling you self improvement. Charisma is the ultimate form of seduction, and that is what this aptly titled manual seeks to instill, via an understanding of both ‘The Aura’ and ‘Pimpness’, the two key principles that should guide your interactions with women.
Inside you will find:
- A simplified understanding of the female psyche
- How to get both mentally and physically prepared to meet women
- How to interact with females and others in social settings
- How to turn interaction into intercourse
- Guide to both relaxation and erotic massages
- Insider tips, drink guides, so called ‘pick up lines’, checklists, etc.
- A big dose of ‘Pimpatude’ This book is designed to go hand-in-hand with the Pimp Guide Systems. Each System provides you with the basic tools that the proper execution of the techniques described in The Aura of Pimpness will necessitate. Hence, we created The System as a natural compliment to the The Aura.
This book is unlike any guide to the opposite sex you’ll ever read. It’s not PC, it’s not nice, and it’s not pretty. It’s fer real. It’s what no one else so far was willing to tell you. This booklet is Pimpology 101 (well, is more like Playa Appreciation, cuz pimpin is an art, not a science). Plain and simple, this is the introductory course to how to get into a chicks head, and what to do once you get there. Granted most of you out there don’t need to be told half this shit, and some of you need way more than any guide could help your sorry asses. But most of us lie somewhere between God’s Gift and Gilbert Gottfried. To better serve our demographically heterogeneous clientele, we both stress the basics and drop some gems for you real playas out there. But we here at PimpGuide don’t discriminate…there’s enough pussy in this world for everyone. Well, except for in China. So for some of you this may form the foundation of a transformation from masturbation to self-actualization. For the rest of ya’ll, this is a refresher course laced with some tidbits to ‘Sharpen Your Game’. Besides, a refresher course is…uhh…refreshing.’
~’The Aura of Pimpness’ Intro paragraph
< Contains over 60pgs of pimpin know-how!
Most users found this kit drastically reduces the number of panties being worn after just one usage. This kit is, like… a scientifically proven system by which to increase sexual satisfaction. Side effects vary and users should consult with their left nut before beginning a sexual regiment. A condition known as ‘perma-grin’ is shown to occur substantially more frequently than with a sugar pill. Mmmmm…sugar pill.
*This product has not been tested on animals. If you do that shit, we don’t wanna know
Mackin’ the Hunnies
Here at Pimp Guide, we have recently noticed a trend in our site’s traffic. There have been a ton of people visiting at 3am who aren’t looking for our NYC Guestlist info or games, but for techniques on “how to attract women” or “how to get girls”. In addition, we have received piles of e-mails asking us just the same kinds of questions. Though our original intent was to provide products that cater to the established pimp, we have in our ceaseless quest to serve our clientele, decided to respond by lacing you with some free info.
What you’re bout to witness here is a sweet little nip of the type of panty pullin’ know-how contained in our pimp kit. PimpGuide is here to show you a good time, cuz that’s what we’re all about. So check out the below advice, use it, and see the change. If you like what you see, check out the Pimp Guide Kits, which not only explain the concept of the System of getting girls, but give you the tools to implement it.
This is not some silly step by step, preformatted program by which to get a girl. Fer real…when was the last time you planned anything with a girl and had it work out how you “planned” it? Exactly. A step by step program means that if any one step goes wrong, the rest of it is shot to hell.
What we did is made a conscious effort to think of what we do every weekend in order to pass it on to you. This is not the one and only way, this is our take on it…it’s what works for us. Anyone who tells you that they’ve got “the way” to get girls is full of shit. Different situations call for different tactics. We do not provide much in the way of specific tactics, cuz if you follow our lead, you won’t need to be told exactly what to do. Cool confidence means that you can do what you will and it will work. Follow are lead and it will work for you too.
Build your Charisma
First off, even though we know damn well you’ve already heard before, it’s worth repeating. You need to be cool and confident. I know, you tried before…and it didn’t work. But we’re gonna break it down for you so you can understand why it didn’t work.
Most important, you need to be having fun. Life’s a game, and you only get to play it once, so live it up! If you have to make a conscious effort out of looking cool and having fun, then forget it. The only way to look like you’re having fun is to actually have fun.
Act like your own personal Tyler Durden would…let yourself go and be free. If you go to the bar and sit quietly behind your beer like someone just ran over your puppy, then your night is done.
Likewise, it’s pretty apparent when you’re faking it. What you need to do is go in and be the kind of fun person she wants to be with. Don’t think she’s gonna come over and talk to you just cuz you look personable. You need to get her attention to set it up so that you can go to talk to her.
Make sure you strike while the iron is hot. Don’t let her see you noticing her and not coming over and talking to her, or else you’ll lose your whole suave/confident image in her eyes. Either talk very soon, or bump into her later on in the night at the opposite end of the bar. Don’t suck down three drinks while you watch her and then try to go talk to her…it will seem madd stalker-ish.
Think about how nuts girls go when “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” comes on at a bar, party or club. I know, I hate that song too, but just listen and observe…it inspires something in them. You have to realize that girls want you to think that they are emotional, that you need to do something to earn them, that you’re not a big deal to them, etc. etc. etc. Really, they just wanna hook up with a cool guy. And they do. So why not be that fun party guy she’s looking for? You’re gonna have fun doing it, and then your gonna have fun doing her.
How to talk to girls
First of all, don’t come off as gushy, like you’re overly stuck on a girl, or like you are somehow gonna be disappointed if you don’t get with her. Even if that’s how you feel, girls aren’t gonna respond well to that sort of approach. You need to let her know that you are interested in her cuz she’s fun to be with, and that if she ceases to be fun to be with, you’re gonna be out to go talk to another chick that is. Leave and go talk to another chick, somewhere within her view. This makes it a competition between her and the other “bitch”, who she’s not gonna “lose” to (see PimpGuide’s simplification of the female mind). So make sure that she understands that you’re a fun guy with options. Honestly, more often than not, it’s that second girl that you talk to that you end up with.
On that note, play the numbers. Fer real, this works. Sometimes the kind of girl that goes for you isn’t the kind that you envision as being you’re type…the type you usually go for, or the type you assume (as in ass-u-me) would go for you. Don’t get stuck on one girl at a club or party, since your chances of getting with any specific girl are much slimmer than your chance of getting with whichever girl is doable. Strike up a conversation with any girl that you are remotely interested in. If she bites, just keep talking and being funny.
Another good yet often missed technique is to simply go for the kind of girl that seems like she wants to get fucked; the kind that looks like she’s gonna hook up with someone tonight. She should be obvious…you can tell whose gonna end up hooking up with someone that night. So if she is gonna hook up with someone tonight, it mine as well by you, right? Usually all it takes is getting up and dancing with her or striking up a conversation. You’ve both got the same goal in mind, and so it makes all your interactions with her that much easier.
Make sure that everything you say or do is at least somewhat flirtatious and sexual in tone. Keep it sexy, keep it funny. That’s it. Ride the cusp of funny and offensively direct. The more she responds, the harder you should lay it on. Don’t assume she doesn’t wanna just suck you off in the back seat, cuz she might. Push the envelope with half joking statements. She knows by your tone that you’re not serious, but knows at the same time that you are cuz you thought to say whatever it is that you said. Let her laugh at you…you’ll get the last laugh.
Talking to girls…Internet vs. Real world
First of all, meet girls in the real world. The internet is a fun place, but you don’t need that shit to pick up girls. Maybe it’s cool in middle school, but you’re a big boy now and chat rooms have gotten way weirder. Ditch that shit as a way to meet girls.
However, online can be a great place to get to know girls a little better. Most good encounters with a girl are gonna end in a phone number. If she wants to give you her screen name, take it, but never ask her for it (unless she’s telling you about how she’s online all the time or something like that). Though asking for a screen name is when you meet her is weak, it’s good to get when you call her back. Many times, people will talk a lot more freely online than face to face or even over the phone.
Think of talking to a girl on the internet as your training wheels. Its madd easier to say outrageous shit to a chick online than face to face for those who are less comfortable with talking to women. But what you have to do is train your mind to think like you do online in your face to face encounters with females. So say slick, envelope pushing shit over the internet and notice how much she likes it. Now, next time you meet a girl in person, behave the same way. She’s gonna like it.
DRESS/ STYLE / CLEANLINESS
Now a major step is getting dressed for success. Gettin some is not all about how you dress, but being well dressed defiantly help, since what you wear is evident from across the room, much farther than personality alone. The key reason to be well dressed is the confidence it instills in your actions.
Dressing well is not about spending $100 on a pair of jeans. It’s about being fashionable, which doesn’t necessarily cost so much. You can get a nice solid colored button down shirt and some black slacks that look “pimp” for much less than you might imagine. What is important is that the clothes fit well, are clean, freshly pressed and not faded or worn. You have to look sharp so that you FEEL pimp wearing it. Like, you know people are looking, and you know that they can’t say shit about how you’re dressed.
Also, it’s always better to be over rather than underdressed. For instance, you’re gonna do a lot better with the ladies if you go in way above the dress-code than if you barely make it past the bouncer. If you’re goin to a local dive bar that doesn’t have anything like a dresscode, it’s easy to be the best dressed guy there, and therefore receive the attention that goes along with it. Plenty of guys out there rock mad hunnies without breaking their bank account.
The most important part is not to worry what other people think. You can’t be self conscious and cool. You need to think about what other people think, cuz you’re gonna have too much fun just having a blast. BE COMFORTABLE and have a blast. Below is an excerpt from our book “The Aura of Pimpness”:
Getting her to dance with you
First, make sure that you are already dancing near her. Make eye contact. Proceed to come toward her…test the waters. Maintain eye contact and dance close enough to bump into her slightly. Keep in mind that about 90% of the time, your have to make the move (meaning if you don’t, your only gonna get a tenth of the girls you should!). She’s gonna:
A) Pull away and keep dancing/making eye contact – This is good, so just keep dancing, but especially try to talk to a girl like that. She’s probably gonna take a little more work, but it can defiantly result in something. Maybe she just needs a few more drinks, or maybe she’s kind of reserved. In any case, this is a hot lead.
B) Run – if she does, move away and start the process again with another girl, hopefully one that didn’t just see you get dissed. Keep your head up. There’s no one that doesn’t have that happen, and it typically happens the better half of the time. Keep movin.
C) Grind back against you. Cha-ching!! Make it fun and not sexual and she’s gonna keep going. If she makes it sexual, by all means reciprocate.
Even at best, one in three is gonna want to dance with you. So use that as your goal and keep moving. Make sure that you are at least approaching half a dozen girls a night. If your town can’t offer that, consider checking out New York City.
Don’t be one of those assholes who goes up and grinds on every girl till she basically throws you off of her. Those are amateur pimps, whose game hasn’t matured. Be slick. Go up near her, make eye contact, and go from there. While we do say ‘play the numbers’, that means that you still have to make a quality attempt. Don’t be on a different girl every two seconds, but make each girl feel special when your near her. Be witty and complimentary. It might sound like a stretch now, but when you learn to truly let go and have fun, she’s going to want you. You’re the party she wants to be down with.
If she’s not already dancing, but is sitting/standing there looking antsy, get her up and get her to dance. She wants to, she just wants you to get her up and make her. Don’t be afraid to be the first one out on the dance floor, cuz that pretty much establishes you as the pimp to be topped and the fun party guy not afraid to get shit started.
Your Pimpin Crew
A key to having fun is who you go with. Usually, you’re gonna need to go with somebody…be it a wingman, a mixed group or a straight up harem. First of all, don’t go with a huge pack of doods unless you’re going to a massive party where you’re gonna disburse. If it’s apparent that you are with a large group of guys, she’s gonna be way to intimidated to talk to you. A mixed group is best. You have fun with the girls you’re there with, and expand the group as new people mix in over the course of the night. Just don’t think of the girls you are there with is your property…let them dance with other guys while you dance with other girls, then switch back to dancing with each other.
A harem is cool if it really is a harem and not just group of annoying bitches that just hang around you.
A wingman is a good bar going system as long as you and your wingman are on the same page. He can be an anchor or a rocket booster when what you want is a Coup DeVille. Make sure he understands you pimpin style, or else he’s just gonna fuck everything up. If he’s super pushy, then he’s no more help than if he was a boring loser, cuz he’s gonna be constantly pushing you up to talk to chicks before you’re comfortable with it.
Make people laugh, be fun to be around, enjoy the time you’re having, enjoy your company!
“Can I buy you a drink?”
Never, ever think this is going to start a conversation with a girl. It implies that you are desperate and assume that she’s easy. Buying her drinks is a not how you meet a girl. You’re gonna look pathetic when she says no. If she says “sure”, she’s usually gonna just take the drink and run.
The only time you should offer a drink is if you’ve been talking with for at least 15 minutes, and you have both finished your drink. Then tell her “Well, my drink evaporated. I’m gonna go get another”. Then pause. Read her body language. Is she seems like going to keep talking to you, or is she glad that you’re leaving? IF she seems interested, get her one. If at all possible, get her to do a shot with you at the same time. This should help get her drunk. And yes, this practice is acceptable…she knows what she’s doing. If she decides to get drunk with you, she has accepted the responsibility of what might happen next. She’s gonna get drunk either with you or by herself wishing she had someone to get drunk and fool around with).
Now is the time to go for it. See, understand this with girls…they got about a 30 second attention span. If you go 30 seconds without saying something, their mind will drift. So lets assume you’ve been dancing with her for a few minutes, grinding close, and you get face to face. If she smiles, then this is the time. Go in easy, pause briefly and laugh, then kiss. Make sure not to push it further than she’s willing to…you can always kiss her again later.
GETTING HER NUMBER
The most likely turnout from a good “girl” encounter. This is typically a good start, and will basically help you to set up your next encounter, which can be much better. Remember, unless your some sort of super star this is the typical response. However, sometimes things go a little faster (meaning sometimes she turns out to be completely easy). See below.
BRINGING HER BACK
While you shouldn’t expect this upon meeting the girl, it can happen. Go with it. This shouldn’t require much explanation here. We’re telling you how to get the girl…our objective is complete, and yours soon will be.